Philip Spiess
Or consider the derogatory phrase, "calling people names." Well, isn't that what we do anyway? As to Ford Madox Ford, who spent the first forty-six years of his life as Ford Madox Hueffer (okay, full name Joseph Leopold Ford Hermann Madox Hueffer -- try putting that on a driver's license!); his father, Francis Hueffer, was music critic for The Times, and he himself was named after his maternal grandfather, the Pre-Raphaelite painter Ford Madox Brown. Ford Madox Hueffer changed his very German-sounding last name (which it was) in 1919 after World War I to the more English-sounding Ford Madox Ford.
Your mention of "Perry Mason" brings us to an even more convoluted name situation. The detective "Ellery Queen," equally fictional to detective "Perry Mason," was supposedly written by an author named Ellery Queen as well. This, however, was a pseudonym for not one but two writers, Frederic Dannay (original name Daniel Nathan) and Manfred B. Lee (original name Manford Lepofsky). Got that?
And Ann's story [below] brings to mind the day we visited Forest Lawn Cemetery in Glendale, California. There was a giant outdoor mural of some event in American history, "Washington Crossing the Delaware" or "The Signing of the Declaration," or something, and I stepped back to get the full kitschy thing into my camera range. As I did so, I tripped over a small footstone identifying the grave of one "Dickie Hickey," aged seven. I pondered this, then commented to my wife, "The child spent his first six years living a full and happy life. Then he started attending public school, and all the kids followed after him, chanting ecstatically 'Dickie Hickey! Dickie Hickey!' at him, the humiliation and torment of which drove him into an early grave."
And did I mention I was in 6th Grade at Clifton School with a rather snooty young girl with the euphonious but quite improbable name of Rochelle Richelieu? Names! It's what other people bestow on you; you rarely get to choose them yourself.
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